Welcome Anais is watching TV. The principle of this weekly column is simple: its author is called Anaïs Bordages and sometimes she watches TV.
If you had asked me a month ago to identify Kourtney Kardashian or Kendall Jenner in a lineup, I probably wouldn’t have been able to. You may not believe me, but I have already amply demonstrated my ability to avoid an inevitable pop culture phenomenon. How Friends and “Les Marseillais,” the Kardashians are among those cultural supernovae that I have been able to ignore with the same force as the false calls of the Personal Training Account.
Beyond some basic knowledge of Kim Kardashian (sex-tape, contouring, Kanye West), I’ve never had the slightest curiosity about the incessant gossip around her family, nor their reality show launched in 2007. nor for their influence in the world of beauty and fashion – from what I’ve seen, their love of lycra, raw and ski goggles don’t really excite me.
But there. Having recently contracted a very trendy respiratory virus, I had to find something to occupy my days of isolation without overstimulating my neural connections. Between two coughing fits, stuck on my couch, I stumbled upon the new show “The Kardashians” on Disney +. Having never heard of these people, I then told myself that it was time to finally discover the sound of their voice and, above all, to try to understand what the world found in this very rich family, often accused of appropriating Afro-American Aesthetics. .
Readers, in a few episodes, I understood everything. I understood the delusional charm, the hundreds of millions of followers on Instagram, the empire built on emptiness. Maybe it was the fever, but suddenly I wanted to know everything about their lives, be friends with them, share salads with them, skin them and impersonate them in their gigantic beige houses.
I was mesmerized by their artificial beauty, their otherworldly plastic, their alien bodies lined with airbags. Suddenly, I too wanted a padded, personality-less waist, nails longer than Meryl Streep’s resume, blonde hair extensions and gluteal implants. I too wanted to have many sisters, to live 100 meters from my mother’s house and to have a dressing room the size of Corsica.
I too want to wear a greige trench coat in my bed.
Yes, because let’s be honest: the main attraction of this show is its opulence. Like everyone else, I follow some American celebrities on Instagram just to be able to look at their homes. But as I watched “The Kardashians”, I realized that all my little stars were just proletarians in comparison. Suddenly, it was like going from a small pool to an Olympic-sized pool.
I drooled in front of Khloé’s garage-sized candy closet and cried with envy of Kris Jenner’s cinema (beige, of course). Despite the alleged hereditary lack of taste, I fell in love with Kim’s ridiculous outfits, which seem to have only two looks: pajamas, or an alien lieutenant from the future. And I was fascinated by the frighteningly tight jumpsuits Khloé wears to … go eat chips at the restaurant ??? In fact, this whole family is in a vacuum.
Really not the dress I would choose to eat truffle fries.
Furthermore, emptiness is the watchword. Like their seamless garments, the family’s interiors seem to push the boundaries of neutrality. The Kardashian aesthetic is nothingness passed through the pressure washer. Their living rooms are so white / beige / gray / greige, that it looks like a cross between an Ikea showroom and a gynecologist’s waiting room. Not a frame on the wall, not a color, not a piece of furniture or an object that would have the slightest personality. At one point, Scott is amazed by Khloé’s new table. This table looks like this:
Furniture made from emptiness.
“The Kardashians” is the anti- “Les Marseillais”: in one everything happens, in the other nothing happens. But this is what makes the show so relaxing, this aesthetic of nothingness, this total intellectual stripping. Everything in their life seems so simple. They eat. They argue. They put on makeup. They go from their living room to a privatized restaurant, to their garden, to another privatized restaurant. There is no stakes, and it’s wonderful.
A very accessible family with very understandable problems
There is nothing worse than reality shows where everyone is constantly yelling at each other. That’s why I’ve never seen “Les Ch’tis” or “Real Housewives”: I’m afraid of seeing people taking the lead 24 hours a day. But this new version of the “Kardashians”, with their forties, perhaps even more relaxed, has the effect of a spa retreat. Frankly, they seem so much nice. At the same time I tell myself that I too would be super nice if I never had to do the dishes or housework, and that the only imperatives I had to manage in my life were:
- Be on time for my sister’s engagement.
- End of the list.
Appearing accessible to millions as you spend your life jogging through the marble fortresses requires real talent and no one can take it away from you. In one episode, Kris and Kylie Jenner enjoy grocery shopping like normal people do, and after being delusional about the fresh produce section, Mom starts laughing when she can’t remember how to insert her card. credit in the machine. How not to identify?
Kendall, a hypochondriac, misses Kris’s birthday to spend the weekend in a huge apartment, surrounded by health workers who infuse her with vitamin C, listen to her list her imaginary symptoms, and check her vital signs regularly: brilliant !! Where do we register?
Sometimes difficulties arise and I sincerely sympathized with Khloé’s anxiety who, after being invited to a talk show, congratulates herself on “Constantly taking risks”. I’ll think about it for my next panic attack! It’s also hard not to be fascinated by Kim Kardashian’s efforts to demonstrate depth.
The show is also very smart to open with Kim’s “Saturday Night Live” presentation, who is wholeheartedly involved in the process. We even see her, during the season, campaigning for the release of a death row inmate, reviewing and breaking the bar! Ok, ok, actually it is the “Baby Bar”, ie a first year exam that tests basic knowledge of the law. But still!! In his place I wouldn’t have worried, I would have simply continued to eat candy in latex suit in my eight-seater bed.
Does feeling voyeuristic excitement, and even sympathy, for the Kardashians make me a bad woman? Of course! Is it all staged? No doubt! But who cares? Knowing how to grab attention and get involved in every corner of popular culture is certainly not a boring job, but if this show is to be believed, it is clearly a job. And no one does it better than Kim Kardashian.
#Kardashian #realm #emptiness #greige